So the wait began and the curiosity was stronger than ever. Would she write back? I wondered if she had other children. If so, do they know about me? I wondered if I would actually look like someone. I knew by the leaflet above that my darker features were obviously those of my mother since my father had blonde hair and blue eyes. I tried calculating how long it would take for my letter to get to her and for her to collect her thoughts and write back (if she was going to). Thankfully she didn’t keep me waiting long. I think only a few weeks passed before the agency called and said that a letter was on its way. Gosh, I remember racing home each day to see if the letter had come. By this time I had seen my friend Gary and he also knew the recent revelations and it was exciting to know that someone truly understood the magnitude of what was unraveling.
The day came. I remember just crying and crying – knowing that I was holding the same paper that my birth mother had held and that it was her words on that piece of paper. I remember my eyes welled with tears making me have to read the same paragraph multiple times before grasping the meaning of the written words. I remember feeling more “complete” than I had ever been. My beliefs all these years had come true - that surely God would protect me through this process. I could only hope and pray for it to continue.
Here is Anita's first letter to me in its original unaltered form (click here).
After learning I now had THREE sisters, I remember getting letters from each of them. I had grown up with only brothers (also adopted) so the idea of having sisters was kinda cool and exciting. I also received one very special letter from her husband. In that letter, Jake indicated that he prayed all these years for this to happen for the two of us. I also remember feeling that his acceptance was just as important to me as was the acceptance from Anita.
The next few months passed with each of us writing and waiting for the next letter to arrive. After several months and many letters exchanged, I called the agency and inquired “what’s next”? I was told that they (the agency) had been monitoring the letters and felt that the relationship had matured enough and that I would have to write to Anita and inform her that I was ready for the next step. If she was too – then she could send me her phone number.
I remember that day when her letter came and it contained a phone number. This was before the internet and there was no google search to find out the location of area code was XXX. So the next best thing was to call the operator and ask where area code XXX was. I was astonished to find out it was a neighboring state. Now the question was how far away did we grow up? I had run into several people in my adolescents that said "Oh my goodness - you look so much like someone I know". Had I met this person before? The answer to my questions were easy - I just had to pick up the phone and call. I honestly don't remember the entire conversation. Some of my BIG questions had already been answered in our letter writing so I think that this was just the next step in our relationship.
Since we now had identifying information, the agency was pretty much out of the picture. After several phone calls each week and the continuation of letter writing, the next step was to meet face to face which will be my next post titled "reunion".